Merry Christmas!

Dear Friends and Family!

Merry Christmas to all of you from all of the BOLTON’s. We love you and want you to know it! It has been a great Christmas Season starting in October with Pandora Christmas Music all the way until Today! We are grateful for the Savior, His Birth, His Life, and His Continuing Presence in our lives.

For the last few days I have been mulling over some of the Quotes that run through my mind this time of year (some new, some old). And for my own pleasure, I would like to post some of them without citations. You can decide where they come from, take a quiz, tell me your score. Some may appear not to be to Christmas Related, but they have come to mean Christmas to me….Enjoy!

1.  And the Grinch, with his Grinch-feet ice cold in the snow, stood puzzling and puzzling, how could it be so? It came without ribbons. It came without tags. It came without packages, boxes or bags. And he puzzled and puzzled 'till his puzzler was sore. Then the Grinch thought of something he hadn't before. What if Christmas, he thought, doesn't come from a store. What if Christmas, perhaps, means a little bit more.”

2. “Business!”.…“Mankind was my business. The common welfare was my business; charity, mercy, forbearance, and benevolence were, all, my business. The dealings of my trade were but a drop of water in the comprehensive ocean of my business!”

3. Be near me Lord Jesus, I ask Thee to stay, Close by me forever, and love me I pray. Bless all the dear children in thy tender care, and fit us for heaven, to live with Thee there.

4. “And now as pertaining to this perfect Atonement, I testify that it took place at Gethsemane and at Golgotha. And as pertaining to Jesus Christ, I testify that he is the Son of the Living God who was crucified for the sins of the world. He is our Lord, our God, and our King. This I know of myself independent of any other person. I am one of his Witnesses. And in the coming day I will feel the nail marks in his hands and in his feet and shall wet his feet with my tears. But I shall not know any better then than I know now that he is God's almighty Son and he is our Savior and Redeemer and that Salvation comes in and through his atoning blood and in no other way.”

5. “Then pealed the bells more loud and deep: God is not dead, nor doth he sleep; the wrong shall fail, the right prevail, with peace on earth, good will to men.”

6. I am not satisfied with the conduct of this division. Some of you men are under the impression having been at Anzio entitles you not to wear neckties. Well you're wrong. Neckties will be worn in this area! And look at the rest of your appearance. You're a disgrace to the outfit. You're soft! You're sloppy! You're unruly! You're undisciplined!
[pause] And I never saw anything look so wonderful in my whole life. Thank you all!

7. “If there were no Easter, there would be no Christmas.

8.  Imagine a big outfit like Macy's...putting the spirit of Christmas ahead of the commercial.

9. But Mary kept all these things, and pondered them in her heart.

10.  “Tell me then,” he cried brokenly, “since my life has been so little worth, how came I here at all?”

“Through the mercy of the King”- came the clear low reply.

“But how have I failed so wretchedly,” he asked, “in all the purpose of my life? What could I have done better? What is it that counts here?”

“Only that which is truly give,” answered the bell-like voice. “Only that good which is done for the love of doing it. Only those plans in which the welfare of others is the master thought. Only those labors in which the sacrifice is greater than the reward. Only those gifts in which the giver forgets himself.”

There would be no Christmas if there were no Easter

So the other night at the dinner table we got into a DEEP discussion.  I thought of a quote that I once heard President Hinkley say and I asked the kids what it meant.  The quote is as follows: 

"There would be no Christmas if there were no Easter."

I wanted Ally and Sam's interpretation....Are you ready for this? 

Sam - "If there were no holidays there wouldn't be much fun."

Ally - "The question should be, if there were no Christmas there would be no Easter."

Well, we have a ways to go....This morning it dawned on me that this would be my 35th Christmas, and shortly thereafter it dawned on me that Christ never reached a 34th or a 35th Christmas.  And as a result of this conversation in my head, I thought of how much time I have wasted in BECOMING something very useful.  I am going need 1,000 more years to amount to anything I would hope for.  Christ did it in 33. 

This Christmas I have found myself thinking more about Easter than about Christmas.....I am not sure you can seperate the two.  As I read my scriptures this morning Issiah told the people that God would give a sign....

"Therefore, the Lord himself shall give you a sign—Behold, a virgin shall conceive, and shall bear a son, and shall call his name Immanuel."

And I wondered what THIS SIGN should tell us. Please add to my list: 

God Loves Us

God is Merciful

God is Just

God has a Plan

God has not Left us Alone

God knows how much we need HIM.......................................

HAPPY THINKING!





Slow and Steady....

I had a flashback yesterday.  We will get to that in a minute. 

As I was pondering what I should be fasting about this Fast Sunday I kept thinking about how BAD I wanted to have the Christmas Spirit in my home this year.  No fighting, secret Santa's sneaking through the house, Christmas music wafting, that "It can't get any better than this" feeling.  That is how I remember my Childhood Christmases and I wanted to leave my kids with the exact same memories.  Then the Flashback came.....

I was probably a Freshman in high school and my Young Woman's leader had given me an advent that required me to look up one scripture each night and learn a little more about the Savior's life.  I was really excited.  My youth was filled with Grand and Glorious plans. This would be the exact equation to really get me in the Christmas Spirit. 

Well before I knew it, there I was on Christmas Eve, all of the festivities had been accomplished, and yet I still had a bit of an empty feeling.  Around 11 p.m. I found myself sitting on a twin bed in the upstairs bedroom looking at that list and vowing to get it done before the day was over.  I think I fell asleep around scripture #3. And the year 1991 passed without really understanding what Christmas was all about. 

I don't think that even if I did finish the ENTIRE list that night, I would have instantaneously been filled with that Spirit I knew was missing.  I think I have finally figured out Why.  God doesn't work with INSTANTANEOUS, God is the MASTER at working with PROCESS. 

Let me explain.  Years ago, 5 to be exact, Jared was called into the Bishopric and I was left to occupy a small bench ALONE with 2 very strong willed children.  It was a NIGHTMARE!  The nightmare grew as child 3 came along.  I remember having lessons on REVERENCE in Relief Society and people giving me all kinds of tips.  I heard everything from , "You just have to be an example...they will follow" to "For as long as they are irreverent in church, you make them sit still on a chair with their arms folded at home."

Well I tried it all.  And nothing worked.  Then the perfect lesson came along and my heart was just soft enough to receive the answer.  I don't remember who said it, or if it was from a manual, but this was the point....."Reverence is a result of what happens at home."  It is against every child's nature to do something for 3 hours that they haven't been taught or felt during the rest of the week. 

As much as I knew this was the right answer, it wasn't the answer I was hoping for, no quick fix....In fact, it was down right scary.  I have always wondered why Laman and Lemuel feared and trembled when they found out the Liahona worked with their steady simple obedience and now I knew.  It is scary to think that so much depends upon the SMALL SLOW STEADY processes that are at work every day in our lives.  It is much easier to go looking for a QUICK FIX, one that requires work, but can be accomplished within, oh let's say 90 days guaranteed. 

God knows that it is in the PROCESS we are truly converted.  The struggle purifies our hearts and makes it much less likely that we will return to old ways.  I have come to know that the Christmas Spirit is something that happens day in and day out.  It will not come when we put the lights on the tree or wrap presents while watching White Christmas (which Jared and I did last night - DELIGHTFUL).  It comes slowly and almost unnoticed.

Last Conference President Uchtdorf said, "(WE)  remain waiting for the Christ to be given to (us) like a magnificent Carl Bloch painting—to remove once and for all (our) doubts and fears.

The truth is, those who diligently seek to learn of Christ eventually will come to know Him. They will personally receive a divine portrait of the Master, although it most often comes in the form of a puzzle—one piece at a time. Each individual piece may not be easily recognizable by itself; it may not be clear how it relates to the whole. Each piece helps us to see the big picture a little more clearly. Eventually, after enough pieces have been put together, we recognize the grand beauty of it all. Then, looking back on our experience, we see that the Savior had indeed come to be with us—not all at once but quietly, gently, almost unnoticed."

I think this is the time of year I start to notice...how many pieces of the puzzle I figured out during the year.  Some years I can see some pieces and others, well, I find myself sitting on my bed at 11 p.m......waiting...and eventually falling asleep :)

The Gift To Weep

Last week, prior to Thanksgiving, it felt like every conversation I had ended in tears.  Ironically, or not ironically, it seems like every Holiday season is "celebrated" with crying and the tenderest of feelings.  To be perfectly honest, ever since March of 2009, when my dad died, every Christmas song I listen to bears many signs of melancholy and celebrations of what used to be. 

My mom, and the block of widows and widowers that I live on have all been especially weepy as of late.  It seems like TRAGEDY is abounding.  Tragedy that happened 19 years ago, 2 years ago, or as fresh as last week seems to be re-lived at the slightest smell, sound, or feeling that each Holiday season brings. 

A couple of weeks ago in the middle of one of these tragedies, I started to notice something about myself.  As we sat and listened to a grieving man.  I looked around to see our friends weeping with him.  As deeply as I felt the loss, the tears would not come for me. 

Then I started to put it all together after having a conversation with my sister Susan.  But I must back up for a minute and give you a little background.....

Kristine, the 2nd oldest sister in my family, had a tragedy of her own last week.  Without going into any details, she had an encounter with the death of a neighbor.  It was not violent, or gruesome, but terrifying to her and to her astonishment (not ours), her reaction was completely hysterical. 

I called Susan, our youngest sister to recount the news of the day, and I caught her right in the middle of a conversation she was having with her husband Bryce, "Bryce and I were just discussing how each of the sisters would have reacted if they had been in Kristine's shoes this week."

Vainly, the first question I asked was, "Well, what does he think I would have done?"

"Bryce said you would have started to cry, but I told him he was wrong.  I know exactly what you would have done...you would have started bossing people around and making a list of things that had to get done for the funeral......"

I had no rebuttal.  She knew me too well. 

Elder Ashton once said, that the GIFT TO WEEP was a SPIRITUAL GIFT. 

Do not get me wrong, I am not covetting.  I know that I was blessed with the gift to organize and work, in large part because of my parents, and I will use it until the day I day.  I can whip together a to-do list and organize a luncheon in the drop of a hat.  For that I am grateful. 

But today I am also grateful for all those who can sit still long enough to simply weep.  To mourn with those that mourn, and comfort those who stand in need of comfort in a very personal way. 

Daniel Is walking (Kind OF)!

Okay, so this post has nothing to do with its title, but I needed to get that into the history at some point.  So let it be known, On November 20th, 2011, Daniel is taking 5 or more steps at a time, we LOVE Daniel (and feel a little guilty that we have slowed down just a enough to savor and enjoy his babyhood the most)!

Enough with the guilt, my mind has literally been SWIRLLING with thoughts for the past week.  Some are not yet discussable, but a few are.....Several years ago, at our Annual Christmas Eve Program, my dad ended the festivities by giving us a loving lecture.  One thing he said has made a permanent place in my mind for years...."You girls (he has 6 daughters and no sons (lucky guy:))  have always got to stay on good terms with each other and remain close.  Not for the reasons you may be thinking, but for this reason....I HAVE A LOT OF GRAND KIDS AND I WANT THEM TO HAVE SAFE HOUSES WHEREVER THEY GO.  Places they know they will be loved and helped and wanted." 

So we have, with a lot of effort on everyone's part, stayed close and happy with each other....and many times, my sister's houses have acted as "Safe Houses" for my parents 21 grandchildren.  I am usually not included in the experience because I live Nevada!  However this weekend, I got a taste.....

Brynne, my niece, and 4 other girls had a speech pathology conference in San Diego this past week.  On the way down they stayed with one of the girl's acquaintances.  And on the following day my cell phone was assaulted with pleading messages.  "Aunt Kathy!  Can we come and stay with you on the way home....It was awful.....They were drunk....I was so uncomfortable....I told the girls you would cook the dinner and breakfast...Please can we stay at your house." 

Two days later a car full of tired girls showed up and we were elated to have them!  It ended up a great experience for US and THEM.  This may shock everyone reading this, but as the girl's left, one of them made the following comment, "Thanks so much, your house was so much more peaceful."  PEACEFUL is not usually a word that people associate with our active little family.

I was so grateful for the entire experience, it made me miss Papa Joe a little, but even more than that, it made me grateful all over again that he was my dad.

On a side note, I think the Lord lovingly lets you have experiences like Brynne's during that time in your life.  I remember being in college, and having a very similar one.   Right as you are deciding what you want your home to look like and more importantly, feel like, He lets you see and feel the possibilities. 

Life is good! And in the words of Papa Joe, "Have A Day!"

This summer, I had the brilliant idea that we should have a little 24th of July parade where the kids in the neighborhood rode their bikes around the block and the adults clapped and cheered, and visited. I mentioned the parade to several friends, and they jumped on board.  I was also on board right up until the weekend before when we had just returned home from a ward campout, the laundry was blocking one of the
entrances to my home, and I was EXHAUSTED. 

I pushed it to the back of my mind and hoped that everyone else did too.  They did not.  Several people called wanting to know the details, and my neighbor Carol (always being slightly more inspired than I), even printed invitations and had her kids take them to every house in the neighborhood.  I remember saying to myself, "FINE!  We will have the parade, but I am not putting one ounce of preparation into it!"  I held true to my word.  My heart did soften a little as everyone showed up, and I engaged in the conversation.

As the festivities started, all of the "regulars" had arrived and we were just ready to start when out of the corner of my eye, I saw a little family approaching.  They live in the neighborhood and we were casual acquaintances, "casual" meaning that I didn't really know their names, how many children they had, or anything about them, but I did wave to them every Sunday as we walked around the block. 

Seeing this as an opportunity to get better acquainted, I quickly approached and we made the official introductions.  I finally knew their names and that they had 3 children, a 19 year old, a 4 year old, and a 2 year old. I followed up with a question to the wife, "You cut your hair didn't you?"  Her response would change my life.  "Actually, I just finished treatment for Breast Cancer."  How are You now?  I said, hoping for the best...."The doctor's told me that I could either do aggressive radiation until I died, or I could stop and enjoy what time I had.  But we are still fighting, I am trying some other things." 

I went to bed that night haunted by her words.  I woke up the next morning and called Carol!  "Do you want to take dinner over tonight?"  Yes!  And so we showed up to her house with soup and rolls that she could not eat (because of her strict diet), and very little to say....But I knew that we needed to be there. 

Over the next 3 months, that feeling returned frequently.  I knew I needed to get over to that house!  At first I invented reasons, but the formalities quickly died and a feeling of great love and concern filled the hole that they had left.  So I and many others went to their house and we went often.  And just as I felt my heart completely attach to this woman and her family, it was over. 

We attended her funeral last week.

In retrospect, I think the last 3 months have been one of the greatest learning experiences of my life.  Beyond a shadow of any doubt, I know that God loves ALL of His children.  I KNOW THAT GOD LOVES HIS CHILDREN. 

And, reminiscent of when my dad died, I also saw exactly how God intended the organization of a FAMILY to work.  Such tenderness was shown between a husband and a wife, a mother and father-in-law, siblings.  I saw this great organization in action and the love between each of them was tangible.  I will never forget the great care that was taken to make sure that my friend was comfortable and cherished. 

At the luncheon after the funeral, a picture video of her life was presented.  In each picture she was holding or standing with one of her children.  As I watched and cried, I knew that God loved her for being a mom.  He was proud of her life, but especially of her choice to be a Mother.  Long after I would have succumbed to the pain, I saw her reach down and say to her daughter.  "I've got to fight this for you.  I've got to." 

It has been a LONG, SAD week.  I'm ashamed to say that several months ago I had NO CLUE what heartache was happening within the walls of a house just 10 down from my own.  I am everlastingly grateful that the Lord knew all along and I am confident that He will be very aware of the heartache to follow. 

The Law of the Oldest

It has been 8 1/2 years since Ally was born and it seems as if I put every hope and expectation upon her the minute she entered the world.  I wanted her to be good! Smart! Creative!  A Singer!  A Writer!  And reading Jane Austen by age 9......Well, Ally is as good as they possibly come, but I have found that my goals may not necessarily be Ally's goals.  And in the same breath, I have also found that some goals are important NO MATTER WHO THE CHILD IS. 

Last Sunday was our ward's Primary Presentation during Sacrament Meeting.  Honestly - one of the best meetings I have been to.  I know there were a lot of kids on the stand.  However, my eyes were so closely trained on 3 of them (namely Ally, Sam, and Gary), that I can tell you very little about the rest.  There are some moments (few to be exact) where you sit back and say to yourself, "It is working, all of our hard work is beginning to see some fruit."  One of those moments briefly occurred last Sunday. 

(Which reminds me...A few weeks ago my sister was visiting my mom.  I called home and asked what was going one....My mom replied.  "McKayla is doing the dishes, Erin is cleaning up, Delaney is helping me, and Heather is making cookies."  I replied, "WOW!  They grew up to be USEFUL!"  To which my sister promptly replied, "Mine did, but there are no guarantees on yours :)  She was joking, I am hoping!)

I just wanted to say that I am very proud of Ally!  I can see huge strides in her, spiritually, intellectually, and in all manners of goodness.  I know that Heavenly Father placed her first in our family for a reason.  My mom and dad always stressed the "Law of the Oldest."  Meaning, the oldest child sets an example which is either hard to overcome, or a an example for all of the remaining children to reach to.  I am grateful for JoDee, the oldest in our family, who set the precedence, and I am grateful that Ally has many of JoDee's qualities! 

I am Certain!

I was sitting in "Big Blue" the big Blue Ford truck that we drove to and from school.  I had just come back from eating lunch at my house and parked in the front row, one of the many privileges of being a teacher's daughter.  For all intents and purposes, I believe it was lightly snowing (most days it was snowing).  Something had been mulling around in my mind all day and it was there in that parking lot that it all came together for me. 

Earlier that week, our seminary teacher challenged us to "pray to know if the Book of Mormon was true."  As a note of disclosure, I must admit that this is the one and only lesson I remember learning in Seminary.  I had a lot of fun in seminary.  When the teacher was not in the room (which was the case more than it was not)  Erin, my sister, Paul Christensen, and I taught the rest of the class how to have "good clean fun."  I vaguely remember a few science experiments involving a ceiling fan and a full glass of water.  It didn't end good.  And is no excuse for any of my children, their teachers will teach them (RIGHT JARED?)

I took my teacher's challenge seriously, and I had been praying, and thinking, willing myself to get an answer.  Then, when I was least expecting it, I got it.  The impression came to mind as clearly as I was hearing it or reading it, printed for my eyes only.  "Kathryn, you already knew, you have always known it was true."  I have never forgotten what that felt like. 

I believe it was that same year, my Senior year, that I really started LOVING the Book of Mormon.  Perhaps triggered by the death of a a good high-school friend, or the uncertainty of what lie ahead of me, I turned to the Book of Mormon to find something - probably comfort or guidance.  Each night I would head downstairs a little early to go to bed.  (This was odd for anyone who knows me. I have been deathly afraid of our basement for the majority of my life, but this was different.)  As I retreated to the "cave" each night, I would write in my journal and then pull out my Book of Mormon.  I read and read!  It began as novel to me.  I became so involved in the story line, that I could not wait to see what would happen next.  I knew all the stories, I had known them forever, but now I loved them, they were personal. 

Through the years it has become so much more than a novel.  I think the secret lies in something that the Prophet Joseph Smith said, "I told the brethren that the Book of Mormon was the most correct of any book on earth...and a man would get nearer to God by abiding by it's precepts than any other book."  With all of my heart, I believe that the Book of Mormon keeps me sane!  It keeps me headed on the path that I know I should follow, and that is true SANITY!  However my thoughts get jumbled in a day by listening to the theories of men and popularities of the day, they quickly correct themselves each morning as I sit, in the dark, open my scriptures, and find sanity. 

I am reading a book at the moment by John Moody, he is not a member of our faith, but puts something into words that I need put into words.  And I quote, " The rules of Mormonism are unbending, but they are clear, which separates the latter-day Saints from many others in these days of moral relativism and may explain and element of the religion's appeal.  Former Church President Gordon B. Hinckley, when asked about the Church's steady and significant growth, explained that the gospel of Jesus Christ offers a firm foundation in a world of shifting values.  For Mormons, right is obvious and wrong has consequences.  This provides a comforting certainty."

I can testify to that!  Certainty provides Comfort and that Certainty can be found within the pages of the Book of Mormon!  I LOVE THE BOOK OF MORMON!  I know it is true!  I have always known it was true.

My Mom is famous!

Surely with all of the brushes with fame that my family has had (none come to mind at the moment), this would rank first on the list!  The October Friend contains a story about a girl stealing an apple.  Yes, it was my mother!  It is a true story, with all of the correct names and everything!  I grew up hearing this story, it has become more of a cherished memory than a lesson.  My mother submitted it a woman that writes for the Friend and she rewrote it for the appropriate space allotted....here it is:
http://lds.org/friend/2011/10/the-apple-adventure?lang=eng

However, she recorded the REAL story for her posterity!  Enjoy!

The Apple Adventure

A True Story Related by Donna Grover Foster – May 30, 2008

Growing up on a farm where lots of people were your cousins was so much fun. There was always something to do, and always someone to do it with.  I remember one such night when two of my cousins and I were walking down the country road that joined our two houses.  We were going to have a slumber party at my Aunt Pat’s house.  She was a great aunt.  I loved going there with my cousin Judy.  It was night, but there was plenty of moonlight, and in our little community you always felt safe.  We were laughing and joking when all of a sudden there stood before us Mr. Cook’s apple orchard.

It was dark, and surely Mr. Cook wouldn’t even miss a few of his delicious red apples.  The only problem was there was a barbed-wire fence between the tempting treat and us.  Well, that wasn’t the only problem.  Some of those barbs seemed to be poking in me and saying, “Come on, Donna.  Think about it.  He is your neighbor, and you are going to steal from him.”  However, the fun of the moment and the idea that there were thousands of apples won the argument and through the fence we went.

It was all going well, and then the dreaded happened.  The dogs started barking.  They came unglued!  In an instant it seemed the porch light flooded the night with brightness.  It was a mad scramble to get back through the fence, leaving behind our treasure—or should I say, Mr. Cook’s treasure.  The sound of my pants ripping was as loud as thunder.  The warm sensation of blood running down my leg was the final blow.  I had done wrong and now I had to go tell my mom.

I hated disappointing my mom.  I was surprised that she seemed almost happy that I had to return home to her hurt and bleeding so she could patch me up.  And while patching, she did some teaching of valuable lessons. Was it wrong to take what is not yours?  Would it have been wrong, EVEN IF YOU DIDN’T GET CAUGHT? I could never forget the night that I learned about honesty from my mom.

The story doesn’t quite end there.  Year later when I was a teenager, one day in seminary we studied about the great prophet, Alma, who had a rowdy son that he worried about all the time. In the scriptures it tells how he couldn’t be with his son all the time and control him so he prayed so hard that an angel came and got him on the right path. (Mosiah 27:14)  I had heard my mother pray for me so many times, that I am sure that is what happened the night of the apple adventure.  I have told my chidren this story a thousand times because I want them to know that I don’t always know what they are doing, but the Lord does.  I want them to know that I pray for them constantly and then I know the Lord will help me take care of them.

(On the Sally DeFord website there is a new Mothers’ Day song entitled “An Angel to Watch Over Me.” I just taught our Achievement Day Girls to sing it for Mothers’ Day. One verse says, “and because of the place that I hold in her prayers” I still do believe that God sent an angel to watch over me.  It brought to my mind this story because my angel mom was as real to me as Alma the Younger’s angel.)

Evil Cannot Develop into Good

This morning as I was exercising, I was also listening to a talk by Elder Holland entitled, "Borne Upon Eagle's Wings."  It was a talk given at BYU.  A week prior to this address he gave a commencement address at the Utah State Penitentary, the talk is basically what he learned from that experience.  The entire thing was fascinating.  However, I would like to share one portion that served as a great enlightenment to me:

Then I had a third thought. How grateful I was that, in addition to just being just, God decided, because he is who he is, that he had to be a merciful God also. We don't need to take the time to read all of Alma 42, but you ought to sometime. After Alma had established with Corianton that God had to be just, it was then determined that that same God would have to be merciful as well and that mercy would claim the penitent. Now, the reason that thought was different to me was that I'd just been where they had added i-a-r-y to that word. That thought gave me encouragement. Mercy could claim the penitent. I decided that if those men had to go to the penitentiary to take advantage of the gift of mercy, if somehow by going there they found the gospel of Jesus Christ or the scriptures or the Atonement or any of those things that might lead to the others, then their imprisonment was worth it. Let's go to the penitentiary, or let's go to the bishop, or let's go to the Lord or to those that we've offended or to those that have offended us. Our own little penitentiaries, I suppose, are all around us. If that's what it takes to make us truly penitent, to enable us to lay claim to the gift of mercy, then we have to do it.
I know it isn't easy to go back and to undo and to start again and to make a new beginning, but I believe with all my heart that it is easier and surely more satisfying to begin anew than to go on and try to believe that justice will not take its toll. As Richard L. Evans was fond of saying, "What's the use of running if you're on the wrong road?" A favorite British scholar said, using the same metaphor:
I do not think that all who choose wrong roads perish; but their rescue consists in being put back on the right road. A [mathematical] sum [incorrectly worked] can be put right; but only by going back till you find the error and then working it fresh from that point. [It will] never [be corrected] by simply going on. Evil can be undone, but it cannot "develop" into good, [worlds without end]. Time does not heal it. The spell must be unwound. [C. S. Lewis, The Great Divorce (New York: Macmillan Co., 1973), p. 6]
So God is just, but mercy claimeth the penitent and the evil can be undone.

FALL!

At the slightest scent of smoke in the air, my heart is transported to Ashton.....Perhaps to the HUSKY HUT, watching the football game, listening to Ms. Howe cook hamburgers, and wearing a heavy jacket all at the same time.  Brisk walks with mom and dad on the exactly 2 mile route that encompassed our neighborhood, mom and dad showered ready for the day, Susan and I sporting pajama pants and one of dad's MANY jackets.  Spud Harvest!  Need I say more? 
Although fall is not really the same in Nevada (sometimes, I am not sure fall exists in Nevada), the feelings are the same.  An urgency to make pumpkin chocolate chip cookies, walk around the block as a family, break out the hot chocolate, and (yes you are reading this right) UNLEASH THE CHRISTMAS MUSIC!  I love fall. 
I also love that fall brings General Conference!  Last night I attended the Relief Society General Meeting.  It was pure genius.  President Uchtdorf made me want to live every day like it was my last, Sister Allred (who bears remarkable resemblance to my good friend's mother) makes me want to be kind, Sister Thompson makes me want to be brave because she has borne trials that I have not had to and with sheer grace!  I love her! 
It is Sister Beck, however, that today I want to thank (perhaps I should mail this straight to her). 
Throughout the years of my young motherhood, Sister Beck has spoken directly to my heart.  She has had the courage to say HARD things, many times, I am sure at the expense of her own popularity!  Her quotes rush through my mind at times, "BE BRILLIANT IN THE BASICS,"  "WHAT GOOD HAS MY LIFE DONE ME,"  "MOTHERS WHO KNOW......."  Today I would like to thank her for simply being an instrument that the Lord could use to shape my family's lives in countless ways.  I know what she speaks is TRUTH.  I have taken her "suggestions"  and cultivated them in my life.  They have grown into testimonies of God's love for families.  He has provided the WAY! 
One year as we were vacationing at Bear Lake, Elder L. Tom Perry happened to be our neighbor.  That week my dad went and bought a flat of the ever-popular Bear Lake Raspberries and delivered them to Elder Perry simply saying, "we never get to THANK-YOU for all of the things that you do."  I would like to take a flat of raspberries (electronically speaking) to Sister Beck.  In fact, I would like to thank all of my leaders who are CALLED of God to serve in callings that they did not ask for, but they were willing to take, simply because they love the LORD.  THANK YOU!

Where Were You?

I was in a car with Candace Riggs driving to teach my 4th grade class at Bear River Elementary.  Radio on, driving in a trance with Candace drifting off to sleep to my right when the radio blasted, "One of the Twin Towers in New York City has been hit by a plane." 
WHAT!?!
"I repeat, one of the twin towers in New York City has been hit by a plane."
The scene unfolded as we rushed into the school, the teachers already standing around a television.....the 2nd plane hit. 
That day I drove with Jared to Preston, ID to get our marriage licence, in 4 short days we would be getting married.  That night my friends threw me a bridal shower. My parents, who were serving a mission in Birmingham, Alabama got in the car and started driving.....a plane would not be bringing them home for the wedding....the honeymoon to San Diego, now became Salt Lake, the plane would not be flying to San Diego either. 
That night I wrote in my journal, "What kind of world will my children have to live in?  I guess I always knew that in the last days Satan would abound in the hearts of men.  It may sound silly, but I never knew that Satan was so wicked.  Such gross acts of evil are so far from my heart, that it makes it hard to believe that anyone else has made a place for them in theirs."  
This week I was sickened to hear that the "Memorial" would be held with out any Clergy, any mention of God.  Why?  Mayor Bloomberg said that sometimes it is "just not appropriate." 
Well then what is appropriate at a Memorial?  Why would we hold a memorial, unless we wanted to provide some sort of hope for the living, how can we provide any hope without God?  We can't!
I wonder if Issac Potts thought is was appropriate when he happened upon General Washington pleading with God at Valley Forge.  Pleading for those who had given their lives and those who would soon have to.  Pleading for success that their might be some HOPE for a future. 
When Benjamin Rush sat by John Adams in the Congress and asked him if he thought America would succeed in the struggle, Adams replied, "Yes, if we fear God and repent of our sins."  Was that appropriate?
There are many "GREAT" civilizations that tired to make it without God.  The Greeks, the Roman Empire, Jerusalem.....But alas, their secular success of stone and mortar has crumpled to the earth and we are left to DIG up their remains and tell their tale. 
I think that I can deduct the message that the Mayor is trying to send to his electors.  However, it may be beneficial to figure out the message we are sending to God.  Let us not forget that how ever-present and all consuming the "electors" are in our lives, there is Someone else who dwells in the public square.  In fact, He loaned us the square, the feet to walk there and the voice to worship or not to worship there.  And one day we will stand in His presence again to account for the square, the feet, the voice. 
I daresay that at that moment nothing will be blocking our view of what should have been appropriate on the 10th anniversary of September 11th.   

"No, I grew up in this ward!"

When a high councilman comes to speak in the Overton 2nd ward, you can bet that about 50% of the time they start their talk with something like this,"Oh I feel like I am home....I grew up in this ward....."  Every time they say that I think to myself, "No, I grew up in this ward."  Although we moved here over 7 years ago when I was 27, I still feel like I grew up in this ward.  Ashton 2nd ward was an IDEAL starting place, but for some of us, on the slower side of life, we need a few more years than the normal. 

When we moved here, Ally was the only child in our family and COMPLETELY UNCONTROLLABLE during sacrament meeting as she made funny faces to the people behind us with her two little pigtails that looked like bug antennae.  We have finally graduated to a long bench, and we are still uncontrollable, there are just 4 more. :) 

However, there has never been a negative thing said.  Just A LOT OF HELP offered and several Linda Lyons and Pat Leavitts that tell me I will survive (every word they say I take as pure gold).   When we moved, I remember being so nervous....we needed to get to the temple each month, but how could I find anyone to babysit?  The second Sunday we were here, Noelle Rust offered to babysit if we needed to go to the temple, and since then, their whole family has practically raised my children.  And the one day that they were babysitting and Sam got locked in the house, with everyone on the outside.  As he crawled around crying, Donna Noto rushed to the rescue with a Locksmith and a check to pay the bill.  She would never let me pay her back.  She said, "I am your neighbor, I was called in a time of need.  It is my job."  And the Leavitts and Whitings don't even mind when my children show up in their house at, let's say, 6 in the morning.  Eat their fries, let their dog go, pick their tomatoes....

And as a mother with my 4th child just 1 month old, days away from Halloween, completely unprepared, and on the brink of insanity, Ruby shows up with 4 Halloween costumes.  How did she know?

This week we received a fun thing in the mail.  It was a a FALL PASS to all of the sports at Moapa Valley High School.  I am assuming that it came from someone in my ward, and if not, I am sorry.  But they would know that we LOVE to watch high school sports, they would know that things were tight right now.  So I say thank you!  We are grateful to be surrounded by exceptional people.  Every time my dad came to our ward he would come home and say, "There are a lot of Good, down-to-earth people in your ward."  I agree, but I would add kind and caring to this list.  Thank you for raising such an out-spoken, loud me, maybe if we live here forever, I just might get it right! 

You can't ignore one end without hurting the other!

I have been vacationing at the same spot, every summer (well, almost every summer) since I was 4 years old.  Bear Lake, Ideal Beach to be exact!  And today I am here to declare that it is a MAGICAL place.  Once you get there, everything you need for a full week of entertainment is all within walking distance.  The beach, the water, fields of deep green grass, swimming pools.  The magic starts with the facilities, and then perhaps moves to the FOOD!
When I was a kid I remember being able to choose a box of SUGAR cereal (which was a huge treat in our house) and bags of green grapes lying around.  My kids will probably remember bags of Hershey's bars and chips (Costco has really enhanced the entire food journey)!  The food is magical (but sometimes hampers the magic after the pounds begin to add up), but I think (this is brave of me) that it might still be magical if we ate mac and cheese all week long. 
As a kid I remember sitting on a picnic table late at night with my dad and sisters after a lightning storm had hit a tree by the condos.  I remember packing the car with mom.  I remember being so excited the night before we were to leave that Erin, Susan, and I stayed up chatting while mom and dad yelled, "You had better get some sleep...." I remember.....PEOPLE......just having one week to do NOTHING but be with each other.
This year, the kids were flitting about, while the sisters were in deep conversation in one of the condos.  The question had to come up at some point.  How long will we keep trying to do this vacation?  It is getting harder and harder to find one day, let alone a week, where everyone can make it! At this point, the conversation  took a more serious turn.
JoDee declared, "I don't know, but we need each other, the world is a yucky place."  We all completely agreed and came to this consensus.  We have to have a good enough relationship with our nieces and nephews that at any time we can say, "You are acting like an idiot, knock it off!"  A person can only take those words right if they know the kind of love that backs them up.  And sometimes, it takes a lot of LOVE to say those words. 
I have thought a lot about a statement made by President Hinkley, "Don't be the week link in the chain."  These are my thoughts.  I am just one link, there were links before me, and there are links after me.  I cannot ignore one side of the chain without hurting the other.  I think I am discovering that we are all in this together, the living, the dead, the young, the old. 
Someone once told me that at some point I needed to cut the apron strings and concentrate on my own family.  Well, I agree.  I need to concentrate on my own family, the links before and the links after.  When I sit in sacrament meeting with my small children filling up an entire bench and sing "Families Can Be Together Forever," my heart melts.  Ironically enough, 30 years ago, my mother was probably singing the song, having the same feelings.  30 years from now there will be 5 little Bolton families filling up 5 little benches, singing, and hoping as well!

The Law of the Tax Return

It is called the Law of the Tax Return People!  It should have been included in the Bible Dictionary right between "Law of Moses" and "Lawyer,"  however it is not.  Someday I will make a new Bible Dictionary, entitled  "Joe's Meanings and Metaphors."  It will have much personal significance, and there will probably be a select group of people on the earth that understand EVERYTHING in it, and the rest of the world will be left to wonder......

Because I am now at this very moment experiencing the Law of the Tax Return, I thought it would be useful for my children if I got it down on paper (web page) so that they would know what it is when it happens to them. 

Right after Jared and I moved to Overton, we had lofty plans.  I believe at the time it included a beautiful landscaped yard.  So we planned and the best plan that we could come up with was to use our tax return to complete the yard.  Several days before the tax return landed in our bank account, our white van broke down, and needed significant repairs.  Shockingly enough, the repairs would cost around the same amount as our tax return, leaving NOTHING for the yard fund.

In despair I called my dad.  "Dad, I am so frustrated!  Our van broke down and now we have to use the money from our tax return to pay for the repairs....We were going to use it to finish our yard!" 

"Kathern, that is how it happens.  The Lord always provides you with JUST ENOUGH!"

"But dad!  Doesn't the Lord want me to have a nice yard?"    

"Kathern, the Lord wants you to have enough!  Are you grateful that you have enough to pay off the van?"

"Yes." 

"Well then, I guess we could look at it that way, it often happens this way, it is called 'The Law of the Tax Return."

The yard eventually (and when I say eventually I mean 2 years) was completed with a lot of hard work, sweat, and more sweat!

It goes like this.  You find some extra money that you really were not planning on.  As soon as the dollar amount adds up, you get these crazy dreams in your head about new carpet, a couch that doesn't sag in the middle, or dare I say...Disneyland.  And then all of a sudden, the unexpected money is swallowed up in a big black hole of car repairs, new water heaters, or dare I say,$996 in dental bills. 

Perhaps the Lord knew about the big black hole sooner than I did.  Perhaps it is really a very large blessing in disguise!

You Are Only as Happy as your Saddest Child

One time I was teaching a lesson and I quoted my mom (which I often do).  "My mom always tells me that you are only as happy as your saddest child.'"  I was expecting nods of agreement, I mean, everything that my mom says should be taken as pure gold.  However, I got chuckles and "well, if that were true......"  I was puzzled and began to question.....but not for long.
Recently I had to prepare a 5th Sunday lesson on the importance of going to the temple.  The outline came quickly to my mind.  We would explore two questions.  #1 - Why is it so vital to go to the temple for the 1st time? #2 - Why is it so vital to return to the temple regularly? 
In an attitude of preparing our minds to delve into the first question I asked the class to tell me if there was ever a time that their parents, or leaders, said something to them that made them realize the importance of getting to the temple.  As I asked that question, a scene immediately flashed through my mind.  We were sitting around the dinner table (to this day, I have no idea how we all fit around that table) and passing the food when my dad made the following announcement, "If you think think for one moment that if you get married outside of the temple and have a reception, that I will walk around shaking people's hands and smiling, YOU ARE DEAD WRONG.  I will not pretend!  That will be one of the saddest days of my life."  Well, we knew he was serious, and the thought of having an ornery JOE at any reception might have been enough to sink the the thought deep into our minds.  Do I think my dad was over reacting?  No!  Let me tell you why.
When Abram's name was changed to Abraham, he was promised that he would be the "father of many nations."  He had ONE son (not a very good start to a lofty promise).  Issac then married a lovely lady (one of my personal favorites) named Rebekah.  They had 2 children Esau and Jacob (still not a very promising start).  Esau marries out of the covenant, which was a "grief of mind unto Issac and Rebekah," and we are left with one child -- Jacob!  As Rebekah sees all of her hard work quickly dwindling into nothing as her children take wives that cannot carry on eternal ties, she cries out in despair, "I am weary of my life because of the daughters of Heth; if Jacob take a wife of the daughters of Heth.....WHAT GOOD SHALL MY LIFE DO ME?" 
I asked the class if they thought that Rebekah was being just a bit over dramatic.  The obvious answer was no.  Rebekah had tied up EVERYTHING she had into being a mother, and if those ties ended with a poor choice from her son, WHAT GOOD SHALL HER LIFE DO HER?
Does God not feel the exact same way?  When he was promising (in D&C 2) that the sealing power would be returned to the earth He then says, "If it were not so, the whole earth, (everything He had planned for, created, and nurtured) would be UTTERLY WASTED at his coming." 
For years now, those words flash through my mind, "What good shall my life do me!"  Every time I feel like being lazy (which is surprisingly A LOT as of late) or when I feel like diminishing the importance of something that happens (which is really easy when it involves any embarrassment of any kind on my part), a larger voice always trumps....WHAT GOOD SHALL MY LIFE DO ME creeps into my thoughts, tells me to get off of the couch, to get on my knees, and do whatever it takes!  Because in the end, I am only as happy as my saddest child. 

From SPARE TIRE to STEERING WHEEL

In June, Jared and I had a "Couple's Conference" to go to in Las Vegas for 3 days.  So my mom, sister Kristine, and two nieces (Heather and Erin) came to tend the kids so that we could leave and not WORRY for a single minute the entire 3 days.  They are so good to us!  The night that they arrived, we ate and played with the kids.  As I tried to finally get them into bed that night, Joe escaped and was running towards the neighbor's house.  Erin and I went after him.  As we were walking Erin said to me, "Is this your life Aunt Kathy."  YES :)  "Well........I guess Heavenly Father thinks you can handle it."  I wasn't sure if that was meant as a compliment or not, but I laughed for days!

While at the Conference, we listened to a short talk given about the Atonement.  The Sister giving the talk said that she used to use the Atonement as a SPARE TIRE....Taking it out when it was needed, using it until she was "fixed" and then putting it back under the car for the next time.  She decided that this was not the intent of the Atonement...Then she asked us, "What part of the car should represent the Atonement?"  After several guesses, the STEERING WHEEL appeared to be the right answer.  It is the only part that you HAVE to have some part of your body touching during your drive, guiding you to where ever you are going.  I thought about that for quite some time......Perhaps the intent of the Savior was not only to "fix" our problems, but to LEAVE US BETTER, in the process, guide (or steer) us to a BETTER me.  If that is how you would like to think of it. 

The entire scenario came together for me when we got home from our mini vacation.  Mom and Kristine had to leave the minute that we got home in order to take care of things at home.  As we walked through the door they said their quick goodbyes, and as they got into the car Kristine said, "Your house is thorough cleaned, dinner is in the fridge and there is warm zucchini bread on the counter."  They didn't just come to take care of things, they came AND LEFT THINGS BETTER.  Why?  Because they love me of course, they love Jared and my kids.  Why does the Savior want to leave us better, help us be better?  Because He loves me of course, He loves Jared, my kids, and you :)  Often, (or all the time)  He wants more for us, then we want for ourselves.

Just When You Think Your Child is Perfect!

The other morning Sam woke up with DEEP thoughts.  "Mom, I have decided that I cannot become an astronaut." 
Why Sam?
"Mom, it takes 2 years to get to the moon and back (I have no idea if that is true)!  Do you have any idea how many Sundays are in 2 years?  I couldn't miss church.....I can't be an astronaut."

This entire conversation came from TOTALLY out of the blue, but I was a pretty proud mom at that moment. 

The proud feeling lasted right up until the moment I tucked him in bed.  I was ready to tell him that it was so good that he didn't want to miss church when he said, "Mom, don't you think Daniel could sleep in the LAUNDRY ROOM, he bugs me!" 

Just when I thought my child was perfect......

We are HOME!

Hello Blog, my old friend!  It has been way too long and my thought process has been cut short for three months as I have had little time to write the things that are happening with us.  I am sure that the next few weeks will be a whirlwind of posts from 2011 summer memories and epiphanies (it may take a while to collect my thoughts as they are scratched out on index cards and notebooks scattered through out my entire house). 
This weekend our stake had a rare privilege of listening to a Living Apostle of Jesus Christ, and his wife.  It was Elder Quentin L. Cook and his wife Mary.  It would be hard for me to recap any of it.  The words spoken left an important mark, however, the things that I FELT left deep impressions upon my mind.  I know that there are living Prophets today. 
President Messer had plead with the members of our stake to prepare our hearts for the message that Elder Cook would bring.  He asked us to go to the Temple this week, and pray to have soft hearts.  I am grateful for taking him up on the challenge.  As the meeting began last night, I said a silent prayer that it would be gentle correction and guidance for me personally.  During the opening hymn, I looked at Elder Cook.  He was not singing.  He was studying the people in the congregation.  I am not going to pretend to have ANY IDEA what he was thinking at that particular moment.  However, I may never forget what I was thinking at that moment.  I knew for certain that the words he would speak were not his own, they would be inspired from a loving Heavenly Father, who knows His children and sees to their needs. 
To end an already FABULOUS evening, one of my FAVORITE things happened on the way out of the church building.  My friend told me that President May from the Las Vegas Temple Presidency, who had just spoken to us, was raised in St. Anthony, ID.  Of course I had to meet him.  As I shook his hand it dawned on me that I already knew him.  He was MR. May's brother (my long time English teacher!).  As I told him that I was raised in Ashton, it dawned on him that he already knew me too!  (This is where my FAVORITE part comes in).  He looked at me and said, "You are Joe Foster's daughter!"  At which point my heart lept, and I said, "YES!" 
This morning I called my mom and recapped the entire story. To which she said, "It is a good thing that we aren't ashamed of where we come from."  How True!  How True! 

He is not here.....

A quick note to collect my thoughts this morning.  They are tender, and should be recorded as my testimony.  Today I will teach the account of the Resurrection to my Sunday School Class. 

President Howard W. Hunter once said, "He is not here, but is risen" (Luke 24:6) contains all the hope, assurance, and belief necessary to sustain us in our challenging and sometimes grief-filled lives." 

I must admit, that as the resurrection once seemed to me as a nice story, since March of 2010 it has become a real life anchor of hope to cling to.

In April of 2009, I saw the following picture in the Ensign:

  Since the day that I first saw this picture, I have never forgotten the look on Peter's face.  It seems to me that it contains all of the hope, anticipation, and desire that must have filled his heart.....running to see someone, just moments ago, completely lost to him. 

I have never forgotten the image of his face, because those same feelings are imprinted on my own heart.  .  HE IS NOT HERE, HE IS RISEN.  Could there be anymore powerful words uttered?

A Bribe??

So about a week ago I got the following text from an unnamed sister, "OK.  Thirty bucks to the first person to write my next talk on Keeping covenants and attending meetings will bring strength and peace.  Seriously a check will be in the mail today if you help me."  So, I am not all about the bribe (but I am not above that either :)  But it got me thinking, and I think I would like to share with the Anonymous sister! 

Peace, sing it with me...."Where can I turn for peace, where is my solace, when other sources cease to make me whole.  When with a wounded heart, anger or malice, I draw myself apart, searching my soul."  Now fast-forward a bit to where the song answers its own question (where can I turn for peace?)..."HE answers privately, reaches my reaching.  In my Gethsemane, Savior and Friend." 

Through a bit of trial, and a lot of ERROR, I am here to concur with the song...The only thing that brings me peace is the Savior.  I have come to find that a state of PEACE is not something that you can WILL to happen, there will never be enough yoga exercises to clear your mind of troubles, sins, and self doubtings.  Peace is a gift from God that comes after A LOT  of  Hard work and even more OBEDIENCE.  It is the atmosphere that surrounds us and we walk the Straight and Narrow path. 

John Taylor said, "Peace is the gift of God. Do you want peace? Go to God. Do you want peace in your families? Go to God. Do you want peace to brood over your families? If you do, live your religion, and the very peace of God will dwell and abide with you, for that is where peace comes from, and it [does not] dwell anywhere else"

What happens to us when we aren't living our religion?.....When we desperately need something to ease our mind and bring us "peace"?  We search madly in all the wrong places.  We seek to please and gain acceptance from people that cannot give us peace.  We spend money on things that only give us more grief.  We find anything that is strong enough to hide our sorrow and the reality of what lies within us.  Remember, Peace is a gift from God, the atmosphere that surrounds us and we walk the Straight and Narrow path. 

The Savior, desperately wanting to grant us the gift of peace, has provided numerous blessings to keep us on that Straight and Narrow path.  Covenants and Meetings being at the top of the list.  When we covenant with God, we tell Him that we will be obedient to HIM first, before anything else.  When we put God first, all things fall into their proper order (PEACE!).  When we don't.....our own insanity reigns supreme.  But covenants are made at age 8, or 19, or once in a lifetime, right?  No, covenants are renewed each Sunday as we partake of the Sacrament. 

There is something that I am just barely realizing about the Sacrament.  Before you partake of the Sacrament, it requires a certain degree of worthiness.....When you take it, you promise to be a little more worthy next time.  When we pay attention to what we are really doing, we will realize that it is a gradual refiners fire. And what will keep us wanting to be a little bit better from one week to the next?  It all starts in Sunday School my friends...It starts with the scriptures.

I believe that is why Elder Cook said that the single most important thing to him was to see his children praying and studying their scriptures EVERY DAY.  I testify that those two things will keep our desires to be good intact, our sanity visible and the peace ABOUNDING.......

A little disjointed, but worth $30 right????

Mission WHERE?

Yesterday when we were eating dinner the topic turned to, "I wonder where I will go on my mission..."  The kids were giggling and talking and Jared said, "Okay, I will tell you where I want all of you to go on a mission."  Then pointing to Sam, Gary, Joseph, and Daniel he said, "China, India, Bangladesh, and Kuwait."  At which Ally sheepishly said, "Dad, if I go, where do you want me to go?"  Without missing a beat, Jared said, "NORTH CAROLINA!" 
Listen, I am all about women's rights, but I was in TOTAL agreement with the entire conversation :)

I Want TO BE

Imagine my most dramatic voice when I tell you that...."I have just recently found the 3 components to a satisfied life."  They are, in no particular order, my NEW COOKBOOK, my NEW FABULOUS HAIR STYLIST,  and my ROKU player.  I would love to expound on 1 and 2 if given (or taken) the chance.  However, today it is all about the ROKU. 

A while ago I decided that I had had enough of paying a lot of money to watch 2 channels of TV and putting up with pornographic commercials.  The bad finally overcame the good and in disgust I called and cancelled my subscription.  In turn, we quickly subscribed to Netflix and purchased a ROKU to play it instantly on our TV.   The Netflix has been good but the real prize from this entire transaction was the $60 ROKU player.  Not only does it play Netflix, but a host of other FREE channels.  Such as Pandora (where I listen free to my favorite commercial free music all day), or KBYU (Yep!, the same KBYU that you are paying for) and the Mormon Channel.  I LOVE THE MORMON CHANNEL.  We can now watch the church videos on Sunday, the MORMON MESSAGES for Family Home Evening, and I can listen to random things as I iron (as was the case yesterday) all at my fingertips, on my tv, for free.

So back to yesterday.  I was ironing and listening to a "Conversation" between Sherri L. Dew and Elder Jeffrey R. and Pat Holland. FABULOUS!  Jeffrey R. Holland is an Apostle in the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints.  Speaking of this, he said, "It is a bold thing to declare that there are apostles on the earth again, but we have a bold message to declare." (surely you know by now that when I quote things, I quote how I remember them in my mind, this memory is pretty accurate :)  I would like to add my testimony to this as well.  As surely as I know that the sun will rise, I also know that these men are apostles and prophets of the Lord!   I treasure every word that I hear them speak!

I have always had a really soft place in my heart for Elder Holland.  It may be that he is an INCREDIBLE teacher.  It may be that he talks as LOUDLY as I do when I get excited about a gospel topic.  It may be that I feel like he loves me like a grandfather, although I have never met him.  However, I think the credit goes to a simple story that I heard YEARS ago. 

The story:  Brad Wilcox was serving as a mission president in Chile when Elder Holland was assigned to go there.  At the time, Brother Wilcox had a young daughter named Whitney.  As she was working on her school work one day she found a math problem that said the following, "Yesterday it took Jeff Holland 1 hour to get to work.  This morning Jeff drove to the train station in 20 minutes, waited for the train for 7 minutes, rode the train for 12 minutes, and then walked for 15 minutes to get to work.  How long did it take Jeff to get to work this morning."  Finding it humorous that it had Elder Holland's name in it, she sent it to Elder Holland with a note asking him to "please help me with homework."
Elder Holland quickly wrote back the following response, "Dear Whitney, I was pleased you discovered my day job.  I regularly submit problems for text books and sometimes I just don't know whose name to use I think I will use yours next....(If Whitney Wilcox has 5 boyfriends in Provo and gains 1 a day for 14 days in Chile, how many of them will be baptized, go on missions, and want to marry her?)  Thanks for being here.  I am immensely proud of you! --Jeff Holland (Read it yourself, it is about 6 minutes into the talk).

During the "Conversation" that I was previously talking about, Sherri Dew asked Sister Holland to tell us about Elder Holland.  One of the things that she said was, "He has a Gift to make every person he meets feel important."  I think I already knew this about him.  It is a quality that I have always wanted.  In fact, I am adding it to my "TO BE" list, I just don't know how to phrase it.  It is easy to say I want TO BE KIND, but this is a little different.  I want TO BE the kind of person that makes you feel that you are always worth their time, effort, and love.  I want to be like Elder Holland.

Point of View

The blogging has been slow as of late, and it will probably get slower.  Why, you ask?  Currently we are in Ashton, ID.  People in Ashton don't have time to blog, they have GRASS!  Why would you blog when you and your kids could be sitting on GRASS, running IN GRASS, looking AT GRASS.  A funny thing happens when you have lived in Southern Nevada for 7 years, South East Idaho suddenly becomes Ireland and all you can see is GREEN! 



This is a picture from my front room window.  (They have trees too!)  Do you see that street light hidden among the trees.  I have literally spent days of my life staring at that light.  During the winter, when night fell, the street light would either lay perfectly still, revealing just how cold it was outside, or it would unveil the snow falling.  And depending upon the amount of flakes and the angle at which they fell, I knew exactly how much faith I could place behind my nightly prayer that tomorrow would be a SNOW DAY (no school).

This is THE PINE TREE that stands in front of the house and blocks everything west of the house from view.  It was planted in the year 1973, the year my parents moved into this house.  At the time it stood 3 feet tall.  it grew as we grew.  Each year on the 1st day of school we would take a picture in front of it.  When we came home from killing gophers mom and dad would meet us in the shade with a treat and GRAPE kool-aid.  The Christensen boys would then proceed to fall fast asleep.  Before its height outgrew our decorating skills, we would string lights on it each Christmas.  And at night, if the branches were coated in snow and drooping slightly, and I squinted my eyes just right, it was a Christmas miracle.  It think it is quite possibly the most perfect tree in existence.  I think my mom thinks so too.  Yesterday she told Jared that we were to "tear the house down before we cut that pine tree down."

Now here is an interesting picture.  It is taken from the kitchen window.  If you look far in the distance, you can see the Ashton Hill.  I love the ASHTON HILL!  However, in this picture you can barely see it. If you were to ask me to imagine the view from the kitchen window in my mind, I would tell you that there are lush green fields leading to the hill and the view was perfect.  Now if you were to ask me if there was a logging business next door to my house I would say - Yes!  And I might even tell you that they store logs and random ugly equipment in the field directly behind my house (like the picture).  However, that never got in my way of seeing how beautiful the Ashton Hill was.  This little scenario reminded me of a recent conversation I had.

My sister said, "Kathryn did you know that Jesse (code name) did something really stupid?"  I said to my sister in return, "I really like Jesse, I tend to think that he has never done anything wrong."  It sounded funny when I said it, but as I have continued to think about it, it is TRUE.  When I have seen the REALLY good and kind part of someone's heart, it is so easy to overlook anything not so good, logging equipment, in other words.  It reminds me of a quote from Joseph Smith...."When persons manifest the least kindness and love to me, O what power it has over my mind, while the opposite course has a tendency to harrow up all the harsh feelings and depress the human mind." Sometimes all I see is the LOGS and sometimes all I see is the HILL.  I need to be a little better at looking for the hill before I look for the logs :)

And My Response IS......

Yesterday I read an article featured on businessweek.com.  It was called, "God's MBA's."  The premise of the article was that several men that have served missions for the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints have gone on to be very successful leaders in the business world.  The article was mildly interesting, however, it did not prove to be the most interesting part of this experience. 

 I decided to check the comments after the article.  This is generally a bad idea, yet I went against my better judgment and read several pages of personal commentary.  Most of the comments were all things that I had read before, including the one that I am about to talk about.  However this specific comment made my heart race, and after a day of quiet contemplation, I am ready to write my response.  On my own blog!  (My niece is starting a blog!  She is worried that people wont like it.  I told her,  "Addie, that is the great thing about a blog.  You write to NOBODY and NOBODY has to respond!") Back to the subject at hand….

The Comment:

 "I find it interesting that there are no Mormon women cited in this article."

My Response:

To that I say, You are wrong.

There is only a feature, an article, a story, because a mother took the time to nurture a child and a wife continued in the cause.  Speaking as a mother, I guarantee that the joy would have been somewhat diminished to have seen my own face on the cover, and not that of my child.

It must feel good to see your name displayed in lights or on the cover that millions will read.

To run or produce a company that crawls through the world with success and fame.  Buildings and Bank accounts untold. 

But to see a child, your child,  with integrity in his heart, and dignity guiding his actions, is true success. 

To see One that you nurtured become a CEO or President and, even greater , respectable enough to bear the name of "father" well...no amount of worldly lights or glittering words could ever compare. 

The only thing that this short-sighted feminist movement has done, is to foolishly convince us that trading lasting joy for a mess of pottage would be a "purposeful" life. 

Perhaps we could all take a lesson from David of old.  Most would say that his reign as king was BRILLIANT!  He united all tribes into a nation resting on a religious foundation, all the while securing the "undisputed possession of the country."  Yet as brilliant and as famous as he was, his family affairs were a MESS!  And in agony he cried out, "Have mercy upon me, O God!" 

In the end, David may have been a great warrior and a fabulous king.  However, everything enduring and eternal was in shambles.  How your family feels about you when you leave this mortal life, will be your greatest heartache or your greatest comfort. 

Sometimes I think....

Sometimes I think that Ally needs a sister.  This morning I overhear this conversation.  "Gary I am going to do your hair this morning."  Okay.  "We are going to do a mohawk!"  No Ally!  "Come on Gary!"  NO ALLY!  JESUS DOESN'T LIKE MOHAWKS!"  I am not sure where that came from, but it works for me.  I love my job!

It's the Little Things!

One time my mom told me about an experience that has changed my life.  She told me of a conversation that she and my dad had while they were engaged.  Although she didn't tell me where they were when it happened, I imagine them sitting in a car in front of a 7-11, perhaps just grabbing a treat for the drive, with the world bustling around them, yet having a life defining moment, acting like nobody else exists.  Only the type of conversation you can have when you are engaged. 
So, in her words, as I remember them, "When your dad and I were engaged, we had a talk.  We decided that in our house, we were always going to be obedient to the small things that the Prophets had said...no face cards,, fake swear words, caffeine drinks...It made sense to us that if we took care of the small things, the big obedience crisis would never come." 
Well, that makes sense to me too.  In Relief Society yesterday, the lesson was on obedience.  The manual contained two questions that I have been thinking about for the past 24 hours.  First, "Why are you obedient?"  I don't know if my answer is RIGHT, but if I am truthful, it is my answer.  GOD KNOWS BEST!  I have a testimony that he has provided the SAFEST and SUREST path to happiness through obedience to his commandments.  I just read a scripture this morning that really RINGS TRUE with me....."For ye have sought all the days of your lives for that which ye could not obtain; and ye have sought for happiness in doing iniquity."  I think in our heart of hearts, we know that WICKEDNESS NEVER WAS HAPPINESS.   
The other question that has weighed on my mind was, "When have you received blessings as a result from your obedience to commandments that seemed small."  By the time I was through thinking about this, I realized that the Lord's blessings far outweigh our efforts.  I would like to share two things I thought of. 
#1 - A couple of years ago, President Eyering talked to us about journals and recording daily our thoughts and spiritual experiences.  I have tried to do that.  The blessings are COOL.  I now have volumes of thoughts that I want my kids to know.  Not only that, my sense of memory has heightened.  When  I write things down, I remember them.  To top that off, I can make connections!  When I hear or see something important, it REMINDS ME of something that I had already heard, seen, or experinced.  It deepens my testimony and adds layers to my life. 
#2 - Around the time I married Jared, I listened to a talk by Sherri L. Dew.  I really don't remember anything that she said specifically, however I remember her talking about the importance of General Conference.  Since that time, I have tried really hard to study and absorb all that I could from each 6 month conference.  It has literally changed my life.  I LOVE GENERAL CONFERENCE. 
The list goes on, and so does my testimony.  It is the SMALL THINGS, that make  the difference, and that makes sense to me. 

So Little Time

 

“Your first duty in life is toward your afterself. So live that the man you ought to be may, in his time, be possible, be actual. Far away in the years he is waiting his turn. His body, his brain, his soul, are in your boyish hands. He cannot help himself. What will you leave for him? Will it be a brain unspoiled by lust or dissipation; a mind trained to think and act; a nervous system true as a dial in its response to the truth about you? Will you, Boy, let him come as a man among men in his time? Or will you throw away his inheritance before he has had the chance to touch it? Will you turn over to him a brain distorted, a mind diseased, a will untrained to action, a spinal cord grown through and through with ‘the devil-grass of wild oats’? Will you let him come and take your place, gaining through your experience, happy in your friendships, hallowed through your joys, building on them his own? Or will you fling it all away, decreeing, wanton-like, that the man you might have been shall never be? This is your problem in life—the problem which is vastly more to you than any or all others. How will you meet it, as a man or as a fool? It comes before you today and every day, and the hour of your choice is the crisis in your destiny!”

David Starr Jordan