Dear Emi,
Every morning, between the hours of 4 and 6 a.m. I wander into my living room, find my favorite chair, and say my morning prayers. Then I quietly squeeze myself into a little place between my chair and my Christmas tree. After turning on the tree lights, and gathering my scriptures...I settle in for an hour of pure delight as I pour over my scriptures and solve all the world's problems.
This is the time when my tree looks the prettiest. When the rest of the house is dark, you cannot tell that Daniel has taken every single ornament and broken them, or that Joe has successfully rearranged the ornaments so that they all hang from one single branch, or that Gary was using a launching system to successfully land all of his toy cars into the tree.....NO, all you can really see is the lights, they overshadow every imperfection. How fitting, that yesterday I found that the only thing to overshadow a sense of deep gloom and fear, was a light, THE LIGHT OF THE WORLD.
A wonderful lady in my ward taught me a lesson that has tutored me for the last several years. She told me that every time I begin to worry, my first reaction should be to pray. So it has been, and so it was yesterday when I heard of the shootings that killed 20 little children, yes the same ages as my kids..and don't kid yourself.....when I looked at the pictures, all I could really see was "What if's." What if those were pictures of my children? Until it almost completely overwhelmed me, and then I knelt down.
During Family Scripture Study last night, we read a very fitting verse.....Alma, seeing the wickedness of the people begins to be overcome with the darkness that surrounds him, until, he finally cries out, "O Lord, my heart is exceedingly sorrowful; wilt thou comfort my soul in Christ. O Lord, wilt thou grant unto me that I may have strength that I may suffer with patience these afflictions which shall come upon me because of the iniquity of this people." It is like C.S. Lewis wrote, "When you know you are sick, you will listen to the doctor." There is only one Doctor who can cure something like this. There is only one Light who can hide so many eyesores and provide happiness when, happiness does not ever seem possible again.
Our kids have been sick, which yesterday found us at the doctor. While waiting for the test results, I found myself asking my Dr., who came from the middle east, if he was a Christian, if he would be celebrating Christmas. He said to me, "I will be celebrating, but I am Hindu ..you know, we believe in Christ...as a great prophet." He told me of how he had decided to become a doctor because of his desire to serve his fellow man....he learned that from studying about Jesus he said.. To which I said, "we believe Jesus is so much more than a prophet." He looked at me and said, "Yes, you believe He is the Son of God." To which I said, "And more importantly, Our SAVIOR."
Emi, Turn the lights on, look at everything through the lens of the LIGHT OF THE WORLD, and suddenly, everything will look bearable.
Love, Grandma
P.S. A verse to Away in A Manger seems awfully fitting at the moment...Be near me Lord Jesus, I ask thee to stay, close by me forever, and love me I pray....Bless all the dear children in Thy tender care, and Fit us for heaven to live with Thee there.
