Daniel Is walking (Kind OF)!

Okay, so this post has nothing to do with its title, but I needed to get that into the history at some point.  So let it be known, On November 20th, 2011, Daniel is taking 5 or more steps at a time, we LOVE Daniel (and feel a little guilty that we have slowed down just a enough to savor and enjoy his babyhood the most)!

Enough with the guilt, my mind has literally been SWIRLLING with thoughts for the past week.  Some are not yet discussable, but a few are.....Several years ago, at our Annual Christmas Eve Program, my dad ended the festivities by giving us a loving lecture.  One thing he said has made a permanent place in my mind for years...."You girls (he has 6 daughters and no sons (lucky guy:))  have always got to stay on good terms with each other and remain close.  Not for the reasons you may be thinking, but for this reason....I HAVE A LOT OF GRAND KIDS AND I WANT THEM TO HAVE SAFE HOUSES WHEREVER THEY GO.  Places they know they will be loved and helped and wanted." 

So we have, with a lot of effort on everyone's part, stayed close and happy with each other....and many times, my sister's houses have acted as "Safe Houses" for my parents 21 grandchildren.  I am usually not included in the experience because I live Nevada!  However this weekend, I got a taste.....

Brynne, my niece, and 4 other girls had a speech pathology conference in San Diego this past week.  On the way down they stayed with one of the girl's acquaintances.  And on the following day my cell phone was assaulted with pleading messages.  "Aunt Kathy!  Can we come and stay with you on the way home....It was awful.....They were drunk....I was so uncomfortable....I told the girls you would cook the dinner and breakfast...Please can we stay at your house." 

Two days later a car full of tired girls showed up and we were elated to have them!  It ended up a great experience for US and THEM.  This may shock everyone reading this, but as the girl's left, one of them made the following comment, "Thanks so much, your house was so much more peaceful."  PEACEFUL is not usually a word that people associate with our active little family.

I was so grateful for the entire experience, it made me miss Papa Joe a little, but even more than that, it made me grateful all over again that he was my dad.

On a side note, I think the Lord lovingly lets you have experiences like Brynne's during that time in your life.  I remember being in college, and having a very similar one.   Right as you are deciding what you want your home to look like and more importantly, feel like, He lets you see and feel the possibilities. 

Life is good! And in the words of Papa Joe, "Have A Day!"

This summer, I had the brilliant idea that we should have a little 24th of July parade where the kids in the neighborhood rode their bikes around the block and the adults clapped and cheered, and visited. I mentioned the parade to several friends, and they jumped on board.  I was also on board right up until the weekend before when we had just returned home from a ward campout, the laundry was blocking one of the
entrances to my home, and I was EXHAUSTED. 

I pushed it to the back of my mind and hoped that everyone else did too.  They did not.  Several people called wanting to know the details, and my neighbor Carol (always being slightly more inspired than I), even printed invitations and had her kids take them to every house in the neighborhood.  I remember saying to myself, "FINE!  We will have the parade, but I am not putting one ounce of preparation into it!"  I held true to my word.  My heart did soften a little as everyone showed up, and I engaged in the conversation.

As the festivities started, all of the "regulars" had arrived and we were just ready to start when out of the corner of my eye, I saw a little family approaching.  They live in the neighborhood and we were casual acquaintances, "casual" meaning that I didn't really know their names, how many children they had, or anything about them, but I did wave to them every Sunday as we walked around the block. 

Seeing this as an opportunity to get better acquainted, I quickly approached and we made the official introductions.  I finally knew their names and that they had 3 children, a 19 year old, a 4 year old, and a 2 year old. I followed up with a question to the wife, "You cut your hair didn't you?"  Her response would change my life.  "Actually, I just finished treatment for Breast Cancer."  How are You now?  I said, hoping for the best...."The doctor's told me that I could either do aggressive radiation until I died, or I could stop and enjoy what time I had.  But we are still fighting, I am trying some other things." 

I went to bed that night haunted by her words.  I woke up the next morning and called Carol!  "Do you want to take dinner over tonight?"  Yes!  And so we showed up to her house with soup and rolls that she could not eat (because of her strict diet), and very little to say....But I knew that we needed to be there. 

Over the next 3 months, that feeling returned frequently.  I knew I needed to get over to that house!  At first I invented reasons, but the formalities quickly died and a feeling of great love and concern filled the hole that they had left.  So I and many others went to their house and we went often.  And just as I felt my heart completely attach to this woman and her family, it was over. 

We attended her funeral last week.

In retrospect, I think the last 3 months have been one of the greatest learning experiences of my life.  Beyond a shadow of any doubt, I know that God loves ALL of His children.  I KNOW THAT GOD LOVES HIS CHILDREN. 

And, reminiscent of when my dad died, I also saw exactly how God intended the organization of a FAMILY to work.  Such tenderness was shown between a husband and a wife, a mother and father-in-law, siblings.  I saw this great organization in action and the love between each of them was tangible.  I will never forget the great care that was taken to make sure that my friend was comfortable and cherished. 

At the luncheon after the funeral, a picture video of her life was presented.  In each picture she was holding or standing with one of her children.  As I watched and cried, I knew that God loved her for being a mom.  He was proud of her life, but especially of her choice to be a Mother.  Long after I would have succumbed to the pain, I saw her reach down and say to her daughter.  "I've got to fight this for you.  I've got to." 

It has been a LONG, SAD week.  I'm ashamed to say that several months ago I had NO CLUE what heartache was happening within the walls of a house just 10 down from my own.  I am everlastingly grateful that the Lord knew all along and I am confident that He will be very aware of the heartache to follow. 

The Law of the Oldest

It has been 8 1/2 years since Ally was born and it seems as if I put every hope and expectation upon her the minute she entered the world.  I wanted her to be good! Smart! Creative!  A Singer!  A Writer!  And reading Jane Austen by age 9......Well, Ally is as good as they possibly come, but I have found that my goals may not necessarily be Ally's goals.  And in the same breath, I have also found that some goals are important NO MATTER WHO THE CHILD IS. 

Last Sunday was our ward's Primary Presentation during Sacrament Meeting.  Honestly - one of the best meetings I have been to.  I know there were a lot of kids on the stand.  However, my eyes were so closely trained on 3 of them (namely Ally, Sam, and Gary), that I can tell you very little about the rest.  There are some moments (few to be exact) where you sit back and say to yourself, "It is working, all of our hard work is beginning to see some fruit."  One of those moments briefly occurred last Sunday. 

(Which reminds me...A few weeks ago my sister was visiting my mom.  I called home and asked what was going one....My mom replied.  "McKayla is doing the dishes, Erin is cleaning up, Delaney is helping me, and Heather is making cookies."  I replied, "WOW!  They grew up to be USEFUL!"  To which my sister promptly replied, "Mine did, but there are no guarantees on yours :)  She was joking, I am hoping!)

I just wanted to say that I am very proud of Ally!  I can see huge strides in her, spiritually, intellectually, and in all manners of goodness.  I know that Heavenly Father placed her first in our family for a reason.  My mom and dad always stressed the "Law of the Oldest."  Meaning, the oldest child sets an example which is either hard to overcome, or a an example for all of the remaining children to reach to.  I am grateful for JoDee, the oldest in our family, who set the precedence, and I am grateful that Ally has many of JoDee's qualities! 

I am Certain!

I was sitting in "Big Blue" the big Blue Ford truck that we drove to and from school.  I had just come back from eating lunch at my house and parked in the front row, one of the many privileges of being a teacher's daughter.  For all intents and purposes, I believe it was lightly snowing (most days it was snowing).  Something had been mulling around in my mind all day and it was there in that parking lot that it all came together for me. 

Earlier that week, our seminary teacher challenged us to "pray to know if the Book of Mormon was true."  As a note of disclosure, I must admit that this is the one and only lesson I remember learning in Seminary.  I had a lot of fun in seminary.  When the teacher was not in the room (which was the case more than it was not)  Erin, my sister, Paul Christensen, and I taught the rest of the class how to have "good clean fun."  I vaguely remember a few science experiments involving a ceiling fan and a full glass of water.  It didn't end good.  And is no excuse for any of my children, their teachers will teach them (RIGHT JARED?)

I took my teacher's challenge seriously, and I had been praying, and thinking, willing myself to get an answer.  Then, when I was least expecting it, I got it.  The impression came to mind as clearly as I was hearing it or reading it, printed for my eyes only.  "Kathryn, you already knew, you have always known it was true."  I have never forgotten what that felt like. 

I believe it was that same year, my Senior year, that I really started LOVING the Book of Mormon.  Perhaps triggered by the death of a a good high-school friend, or the uncertainty of what lie ahead of me, I turned to the Book of Mormon to find something - probably comfort or guidance.  Each night I would head downstairs a little early to go to bed.  (This was odd for anyone who knows me. I have been deathly afraid of our basement for the majority of my life, but this was different.)  As I retreated to the "cave" each night, I would write in my journal and then pull out my Book of Mormon.  I read and read!  It began as novel to me.  I became so involved in the story line, that I could not wait to see what would happen next.  I knew all the stories, I had known them forever, but now I loved them, they were personal. 

Through the years it has become so much more than a novel.  I think the secret lies in something that the Prophet Joseph Smith said, "I told the brethren that the Book of Mormon was the most correct of any book on earth...and a man would get nearer to God by abiding by it's precepts than any other book."  With all of my heart, I believe that the Book of Mormon keeps me sane!  It keeps me headed on the path that I know I should follow, and that is true SANITY!  However my thoughts get jumbled in a day by listening to the theories of men and popularities of the day, they quickly correct themselves each morning as I sit, in the dark, open my scriptures, and find sanity. 

I am reading a book at the moment by John Moody, he is not a member of our faith, but puts something into words that I need put into words.  And I quote, " The rules of Mormonism are unbending, but they are clear, which separates the latter-day Saints from many others in these days of moral relativism and may explain and element of the religion's appeal.  Former Church President Gordon B. Hinckley, when asked about the Church's steady and significant growth, explained that the gospel of Jesus Christ offers a firm foundation in a world of shifting values.  For Mormons, right is obvious and wrong has consequences.  This provides a comforting certainty."

I can testify to that!  Certainty provides Comfort and that Certainty can be found within the pages of the Book of Mormon!  I LOVE THE BOOK OF MORMON!  I know it is true!  I have always known it was true.

My Mom is famous!

Surely with all of the brushes with fame that my family has had (none come to mind at the moment), this would rank first on the list!  The October Friend contains a story about a girl stealing an apple.  Yes, it was my mother!  It is a true story, with all of the correct names and everything!  I grew up hearing this story, it has become more of a cherished memory than a lesson.  My mother submitted it a woman that writes for the Friend and she rewrote it for the appropriate space allotted....here it is:
http://lds.org/friend/2011/10/the-apple-adventure?lang=eng

However, she recorded the REAL story for her posterity!  Enjoy!

The Apple Adventure

A True Story Related by Donna Grover Foster – May 30, 2008

Growing up on a farm where lots of people were your cousins was so much fun. There was always something to do, and always someone to do it with.  I remember one such night when two of my cousins and I were walking down the country road that joined our two houses.  We were going to have a slumber party at my Aunt Pat’s house.  She was a great aunt.  I loved going there with my cousin Judy.  It was night, but there was plenty of moonlight, and in our little community you always felt safe.  We were laughing and joking when all of a sudden there stood before us Mr. Cook’s apple orchard.

It was dark, and surely Mr. Cook wouldn’t even miss a few of his delicious red apples.  The only problem was there was a barbed-wire fence between the tempting treat and us.  Well, that wasn’t the only problem.  Some of those barbs seemed to be poking in me and saying, “Come on, Donna.  Think about it.  He is your neighbor, and you are going to steal from him.”  However, the fun of the moment and the idea that there were thousands of apples won the argument and through the fence we went.

It was all going well, and then the dreaded happened.  The dogs started barking.  They came unglued!  In an instant it seemed the porch light flooded the night with brightness.  It was a mad scramble to get back through the fence, leaving behind our treasure—or should I say, Mr. Cook’s treasure.  The sound of my pants ripping was as loud as thunder.  The warm sensation of blood running down my leg was the final blow.  I had done wrong and now I had to go tell my mom.

I hated disappointing my mom.  I was surprised that she seemed almost happy that I had to return home to her hurt and bleeding so she could patch me up.  And while patching, she did some teaching of valuable lessons. Was it wrong to take what is not yours?  Would it have been wrong, EVEN IF YOU DIDN’T GET CAUGHT? I could never forget the night that I learned about honesty from my mom.

The story doesn’t quite end there.  Year later when I was a teenager, one day in seminary we studied about the great prophet, Alma, who had a rowdy son that he worried about all the time. In the scriptures it tells how he couldn’t be with his son all the time and control him so he prayed so hard that an angel came and got him on the right path. (Mosiah 27:14)  I had heard my mother pray for me so many times, that I am sure that is what happened the night of the apple adventure.  I have told my chidren this story a thousand times because I want them to know that I don’t always know what they are doing, but the Lord does.  I want them to know that I pray for them constantly and then I know the Lord will help me take care of them.

(On the Sally DeFord website there is a new Mothers’ Day song entitled “An Angel to Watch Over Me.” I just taught our Achievement Day Girls to sing it for Mothers’ Day. One verse says, “and because of the place that I hold in her prayers” I still do believe that God sent an angel to watch over me.  It brought to my mind this story because my angel mom was as real to me as Alma the Younger’s angel.)

Evil Cannot Develop into Good

This morning as I was exercising, I was also listening to a talk by Elder Holland entitled, "Borne Upon Eagle's Wings."  It was a talk given at BYU.  A week prior to this address he gave a commencement address at the Utah State Penitentary, the talk is basically what he learned from that experience.  The entire thing was fascinating.  However, I would like to share one portion that served as a great enlightenment to me:

Then I had a third thought. How grateful I was that, in addition to just being just, God decided, because he is who he is, that he had to be a merciful God also. We don't need to take the time to read all of Alma 42, but you ought to sometime. After Alma had established with Corianton that God had to be just, it was then determined that that same God would have to be merciful as well and that mercy would claim the penitent. Now, the reason that thought was different to me was that I'd just been where they had added i-a-r-y to that word. That thought gave me encouragement. Mercy could claim the penitent. I decided that if those men had to go to the penitentiary to take advantage of the gift of mercy, if somehow by going there they found the gospel of Jesus Christ or the scriptures or the Atonement or any of those things that might lead to the others, then their imprisonment was worth it. Let's go to the penitentiary, or let's go to the bishop, or let's go to the Lord or to those that we've offended or to those that have offended us. Our own little penitentiaries, I suppose, are all around us. If that's what it takes to make us truly penitent, to enable us to lay claim to the gift of mercy, then we have to do it.
I know it isn't easy to go back and to undo and to start again and to make a new beginning, but I believe with all my heart that it is easier and surely more satisfying to begin anew than to go on and try to believe that justice will not take its toll. As Richard L. Evans was fond of saying, "What's the use of running if you're on the wrong road?" A favorite British scholar said, using the same metaphor:
I do not think that all who choose wrong roads perish; but their rescue consists in being put back on the right road. A [mathematical] sum [incorrectly worked] can be put right; but only by going back till you find the error and then working it fresh from that point. [It will] never [be corrected] by simply going on. Evil can be undone, but it cannot "develop" into good, [worlds without end]. Time does not heal it. The spell must be unwound. [C. S. Lewis, The Great Divorce (New York: Macmillan Co., 1973), p. 6]
So God is just, but mercy claimeth the penitent and the evil can be undone.

FALL!

At the slightest scent of smoke in the air, my heart is transported to Ashton.....Perhaps to the HUSKY HUT, watching the football game, listening to Ms. Howe cook hamburgers, and wearing a heavy jacket all at the same time.  Brisk walks with mom and dad on the exactly 2 mile route that encompassed our neighborhood, mom and dad showered ready for the day, Susan and I sporting pajama pants and one of dad's MANY jackets.  Spud Harvest!  Need I say more? 
Although fall is not really the same in Nevada (sometimes, I am not sure fall exists in Nevada), the feelings are the same.  An urgency to make pumpkin chocolate chip cookies, walk around the block as a family, break out the hot chocolate, and (yes you are reading this right) UNLEASH THE CHRISTMAS MUSIC!  I love fall. 
I also love that fall brings General Conference!  Last night I attended the Relief Society General Meeting.  It was pure genius.  President Uchtdorf made me want to live every day like it was my last, Sister Allred (who bears remarkable resemblance to my good friend's mother) makes me want to be kind, Sister Thompson makes me want to be brave because she has borne trials that I have not had to and with sheer grace!  I love her! 
It is Sister Beck, however, that today I want to thank (perhaps I should mail this straight to her). 
Throughout the years of my young motherhood, Sister Beck has spoken directly to my heart.  She has had the courage to say HARD things, many times, I am sure at the expense of her own popularity!  Her quotes rush through my mind at times, "BE BRILLIANT IN THE BASICS,"  "WHAT GOOD HAS MY LIFE DONE ME,"  "MOTHERS WHO KNOW......."  Today I would like to thank her for simply being an instrument that the Lord could use to shape my family's lives in countless ways.  I know what she speaks is TRUTH.  I have taken her "suggestions"  and cultivated them in my life.  They have grown into testimonies of God's love for families.  He has provided the WAY! 
One year as we were vacationing at Bear Lake, Elder L. Tom Perry happened to be our neighbor.  That week my dad went and bought a flat of the ever-popular Bear Lake Raspberries and delivered them to Elder Perry simply saying, "we never get to THANK-YOU for all of the things that you do."  I would like to take a flat of raspberries (electronically speaking) to Sister Beck.  In fact, I would like to thank all of my leaders who are CALLED of God to serve in callings that they did not ask for, but they were willing to take, simply because they love the LORD.  THANK YOU!